A Perfect World
by scifiromance
Summary: Why did Seven start her simulations that we saw in "Human Error"? And why did she choose Chakotay? One-shot. C/7.


Seven of Nine was, to use the human expression, at a loose end. She did acknowledge that being off duty had its advantages but today they weren't making themselves known and her only desire was to make her meal as short as possible and retreat back into the cargo bay to do something useful with her time but as soon as she stepped into the Mess Hall she knew that that would be unlikely.

The room was an explosion of red, pink and white, strings of paper hearts hung from the ceiling, lightly brushing the faces of her crewmates who filled the room to capacity. She gazed at this spectacle in confused awe, her eyes finally settling on Neelix as he weaved expertly through the crowds towards her, holding a huge overflowing vase of red roses above his head. "Seven!" he exclaimed brightly as he reached her. "Welcome to Voyager's Inaugural Valentine's Day Celebration!"

"Valentine's Day?" Seven echoed as a sense of dread rose up within her.

"Yes, it's a human holiday celebrating love. Wonderful idea isn't it?" Seven hadn't needed the explanation; her social lessons with the Doctor had made the concept clear to her. He looked at her expectantly for approval, it was all she could do to nod her head, skilfully hiding her distaste at the entire idea and Neelix swallowed the deception and continued, "Would you like to try my Talaxian Aphrodisiac Wine? It's a family speciality."

Seven was saved from that prospect by Tom and B'Elanna's timely arrival. B'Elanna looked around in disbelief. "This is a new one, even for you Neelix. Why'd you come up with it?"

"Well I thought everybody needed perking up after the incident on Quarra…" Neelix began.

"Well there's nothing like a little loving to make you forget about a few weeks of retrograde amnesia is there?" Tom joked jovially but with an affectionate smile at B'Elanna.

"_You_ would think that that cures everything Tom!" Harry remarked from where he stood with the Doctor, who predictably approached Seven.

"I'm very encouraged to see you here Seven, it's the perfect environment for furthering your social skills." He, rather pompously to her ears, commended her.

"I did not come here to engage in this party." She corrected him bluntly.

He sighed in irritation. "No, of course you didn't. What was I thinking?" he muttered sarcastically under his breath. Seven braced herself for a lecture but thankfully it didn't come as Neelix just then asked him to choose romantic background music and he, pleased that his musical prowess was being recognised, abruptly left Seven to her own devices.

Excusing herself from conversation Seven quickly replicated a Borg nutritional supplement and headed for an empty table furthest from the bulk of the crowd. Since she'd discovered her talent and enjoyment of cooking she had mostly abandoned these tasteless supplements but these were special circumstances where speed of consumption and a quick exit were her top priorities. She couldn't help but observe the way in which the attendants gradually split into pairs and although she doubted that any meaningful relationships could possibly form in such a place she felt that now familiar empty restless feeling which had plagued her since Unimatrix Zero had collapsed. Axum would've probably laughed at the escapades of her crewmates…no, perhaps not, he would have been fully engaged with them… Sadness enveloped her as she realised she had no idea what he would have done, she didn't remember much of him at all, despite the tantalising snippets of visual flashback which would taunt her at odd moments. She released a deep sigh before catching herself and bringing the self pity to a halt. It's for the best; she reminded herself sharply, what would come of remembering anyway? Nothing but grief over someone she couldn't have and that was an utterly pointless expenditure of her mental energy.

A flustered laugh from nearby pulled Seven from her own thoughts and back to her observations, it did appear enjoyable, for the humanoids at least, and who was she to judge? Morale _had_ been low ever since their memories had been restored and if this proved effective then so be it, even if it did increase her own feelings of isolation. At that moment she caught her own reflection in the shining surface of the table and was suddenly struck by its jarring nature, neither Borg nor human, a paradox in every way. Her innate human individualism and pride made a return to the Borg unpalatable but her Borg upbringing restrained every human impulse…

With a gulp she stood up abruptly from her chair and left the room, unable to stand the trail of her own thoughts any longer. Harry looked after her in concern. "What's up with Seven?"

"She just doesn't like being in the presence of things she doesn't understand." The Doctor replied in a resigned tone.

"Are you sure that's what it is?" Harry asked doubtfully.

Tom chuckled. "Come on Harry, we all know you just want her to understand _you_." He teased. Harry blushed a little but didn't deny it too fervently.

The next thing Seven was aware of was crashing into someone, sending a pile of data pads flying across the floor. She automatically bent to pick them up, her embarrassment increasing as their owner spoke. "Sorry Seven, I should have been looking."

Seven glanced up into the Commander's eyes which were warm with amusement and stood to attention, Chakotay picking up on the uncharacteristic pink hue to her pale complexion as she replied, "The fault lies with me Commander, I apologise."

He waved his hand dismissively, "Just an accident. Where were you headed in such a rush anyway?"

"Nowhere…" Seven mumbled, she really had had no set destination but saw that his curiosity was piqued. "Neelix is holding a Valentine's Day themed celebration in the Mess Hall…" she explained haltingly and his face creased in immediate understanding.

"I see. My replicator in my quarters better be working tonight then!"

"I can fix it for you if you wish Commander…"

He smiled, "I didn't mean it like that, just thanks for the warning." Seven nodded in acknowledgement and as he continued on his way she glanced around to see where she'd ended up seeing the doors of Holodeck 2 looming in front of her. She was about to turn back and head for her cargo bay when an idea hit her, after all what had Unimatrix Zero been but a simulation?

Her first frustrating effort at holographic programming was an attempt at a recreation of the Unimatrix Zero environment but she quickly realised that that, like trying to grasp the logic of a dream, was impossible. She then went through hundreds of backgrounds, parks, beaches, stately homes but none seemed real to her, only exacerbating the difference between reality and projection. The characters were even worse, yes the men were all flawless in their physical attractiveness but that only reinforced the fact that they were holograms, any interaction was two dimensional and pointless. Finally to clear her head she ordered, "Computer, recreate Voyager."

The effect was instantaneous, she found herself standing in a Mess Hall exactly like the one she'd just left. A comforting sense of the familiar immediately settled on her and she felt herself relax, knowing that she'd find no better substitute. "Computer, download the crew's most recent psychological profiles and put them as characters in the programme." The Mess Hall filled with silent unmoving holographic portrayals of the Voyager crew and she felt a prickle of guilt. No, it's harmless! Just like the Doctor's social lessons! She convinced herself, now how to make them any easier to interact with than the people outside? "Computer, relax their social conventions and their attitude to me by…two degrees." A beep of confirmation. What else could she do? She swallowed, it must be her that changed, that was were the fault lay after all. "Computer, a mirror." A floor length mirror materialised in front of her and she gazed pensively into it.

A human reflection, hair loose and eyes happy, Axum smiling over her shoulder… She shook her head to dislodge the flashback but it gave her an idea. "Computer…remove my implants…" she whispered, half hoping and half dreading the result. It shocked her even more than she expected, in awe she ran her disbelieving fingers over her face and down her arm but felt only warm skin rather than the usual ice cold metal. Gulping she forced the assessment to go further, ordering clothing options and although not confident enough to pick the red dress first offered she took her time in choosing a fitted short sleeved blouse in cranberry silk which showed off her now unscarred arms and plain but figure hugging black trousers, keeping her shoes as they were. Although pleased she felt it wasn't yet complete and on impulse pulled her hair from its pins and let it fall free. It was in surprise that she realised her reflection was beaming back at her.

It took a lot of soul searching to take the next step but she knew it was necessary as she finally sat going through her male crewmates for a possible romantic interest. It was proving a more difficult task than she envisioned, the vast majority were physically attractive on some level but there was something missing that she couldn't quantify… Just as she was about to give up the computer pulled up another profile and she saw Commander Chakotay, the holographic version of him of course, standing before her. The choice was instant but she felt flustered and questioned it, not the First Officer, it bordered on the indecent, almost sacrilegious in Starfleet terms… Defensiveness filled her, why not? He was an attractive man and he'd never know. Besides there was a level of safety in him, who'd never see her like that and whom she very rarely interacted with on a personal level in reality. Quickly she ran through his listed interests, they actually apparently shared many so she didn't feel the need to change anything on that basis but the real version had shown a propensity for probing questions, she remembered when out of the blue he'd asked her what her childhood dream was and she'd actually _told_ him, much to her eternal embarrassment. He'd wanted to be an anthropologist by the age of six if her memory was correct. She smiled semiconsciously at the image of a six year old Chakotay digging for artefacts, no, he could ask her whatever he wished. "Computer, place a…romantic interest in me within the Chakotay hologram." She finally ordered, leaving him otherwise unaltered as she played around with the other specifics of the programme.

The same Mess Hall, same people and same tacky Valentine decorations, stood buzzing with activity with only one difference, Seven comfortable in her skin as she stood in the group, constantly schooling herself that her normal reserve was unnecessary here as she listened to the Captain, "How are you feeling now that the Doctor's removed your cybernetic systems Seven?" she asked.

"I feel that my self esteem has improved Captain." Seven replied honestly.

"Good, that was the main idea! We should discuss if you want to make more changes…" Tuvok tapped the Captain on the arm, "Excuse me Seven, we'll talk another time, have fun." She turned away and Seven saw Chakotay just to the side of her, looking at her intently.

"Can I do something for you Commander?" she asked but immediately cringed, the point of this programme was not to talk like that!

He seemed to let it pass, just smiling at her somewhat sheepishly as he said, "No not at all. I was just thinking that you look great…"

She fought the blush which came even though she had programmed this sort of interaction in. "I find the removal of my implants has been an improvement."

"That's not what I meant. You were always beautiful…" She saw him swallow and take a drink from a nearby tray. "You just look really happy and relaxed, it's a nice thing to see."

"Thank you…" She started but paused as he choked on the drink in disgust.

"What is this?" he asked.

Seven looked at the glass. "I think it's Neelix's Aphrodisiac wine."

He laughed softly. "That explains it." He leaned into her slightly as he said in a confidential tone, "Since it's no good for drinking maybe we should toast with it instead."

Seven returned the smile and lifted a drink, sensibly of water, even in the holodecks she doubted if Neelix's concoctions were fit for consumption. "A toast to what?" she asked.

He looked at her for a long moment. "To…new beginnings."

Seven smiled as their glasses clinked. "New beginnings."

At that moment the Captain's voice pierced the air. "Seven of Nine, report to the Bridge." Chakotay didn't react and she slowly realised that it came from outside.

"On my way Captain." She replied shakily. "Computer…deactivate programme." As soon as Chakotay and everything else disappeared she felt as if she'd been dunked in ice water and shivered as she looked down at her biosuit and her cybernetic hand, regret at ever tempting herself this way filling her until she remembered that she could start again where she left off and relief overwhelmed her. The Captain called again, sounding irritated and Seven turned to leave but it wasn't until she was almost out the door that she realised her hair was still free from it's restraints.

**A/n: How was my first one-shot? Please review!**


End file.
